Over recent years, Lakes High School has been trying to foster a more inclusive environment by calling students by their correct preferred name and pronouns. Some students do not believe that teachers are being inclusive enough, but others believe that they are doing the best they can. We conducted interviews among students and staff to discover common ground and what can be done to make everyone comfortable. 

One of the authors recounts an experience that left a lasting impression on them, their first day of Lakes they had stood at the front of the classroom answering student questions about themselves, as questions were wrapping up one student asked what preferred pronouns they used, in a loud and steady voice they responded, “Thanks for asking, I use they/them pronouns” Immediately after the teacher turned to the class and said, “Okay enough questions, she can go sit down now” 

“That one experience honestly still impacts me today. The fact I was addressed using she right after stating my preferred pronouns felt disrespectful, I am very understanding to honest blunders but the way it was said felt intentional. Afterwards I never really attempted to tell teachers that I identify with they/them pronouns because I felt like I would never be listened to or respected.’ 

A senior who wishes to remain anonymous answered a series of questions: 

Do you tell teachers your preference of pronouns? 

“No, because they never end up using any other ones other than she/her.” 

How do you feel about teachers dead naming their students and using wrong pronouns even if the student has told them early on? Explain.
“It makes me upset. Like you told the teacher, this is my name use this name please, but they still do not yet they will call a student but a nickname with no problem.” 

Is there anything the school could do to make students more comfortable like holding the teacher accountable? 

“I’m not sure, maybe be like ‘hey this student goes by –insert name- please do not call them any other name.’” 

Lakes High School administration is attempting to reform to better support diverse student populations however many students, especially students who do not identify with their assigned gender at birth, feel like staffs’ attempts are not living up to expectations. 

Here are some of the staff’s responses to questions we have asked. 

Ms. Harrell (she/her)  

Do you believe your students feel comfortable discussing preferred pronouns and names with you?  

I think most students are comfortable sharing preferred pronouns and names with me simply because I ask and if they share, I make sure I respect those and use them.   

What do you, as a teacher, do to make students who identify other than their assigned gender at birth feel comfortable and respected in the classroom?  

I try to make it normal (because it is) and use examples in class that are inclusive.  If students are talking about things that might make students uncomfortable, I stop the conversations and make sure to remind them this is a safe space where everyone is welcome, and every lifestyle is viewed as normal.   

Are there any specific classroom rituals such as beginning of semester introductions that promote diversity and inclusion? 

I have each student fill out a card to share information about themselves with me that includes preferred name and opportunity to share what they want.   

 How do you hold yourself accountable when you misgender a student, or fail to address them by their preferred name?  

I apologize because it is my job to make students feel seen and heard.  Then I will work really hard to not let it happen again!!! 

What in your opinion can Lakes do to better ensure and promote inclusion of students who identify differently than their assigned gender at birth?  

We always can do better, but there are many staff members who work really hard at creating a culture of inclusivity. At least I hope that students feel valued and part of the beauty of our diverse student body. 

Another teacher, Ms. Johnson (she/her) responded to our questions. 

Do you believe your students feel comfortable discussing preferred pronouns and names with you?  

I think most of my students feel comfortable discussing their preferred pronouns and names; I ask students how they prefer to be called when I meet them. I have worked with several students who do not identify as their assigned gender at birth.

What do you, as a teacher, do to make students who identify with other than their assigned gender at birth feels comfortable and respected in the classroom?  

As a teacher, the first thing I do is ask students their preferred name and pronouns. I use those preferred names on the nametags in my classroom. This is the first year I have used nametags but coming out of the pandemic when I was meeting some students for the first time – all masked – the tags were a great help to me. They were certainly helpful to me in getting names right early in the year. Another thing I do is ask the student in private (or in writing, as on a survey) whether they use the same name/pronouns at home as they do at school. It is not my place to out someone, and I do not want to cause any further stress to a student that is likely experiencing extreme stress all the time. When I speak with a student’s parents, I try to avoid all pronouns if I can in the conversation, to ease any discomfort my student may have. 
 

Are there any specific classroom rituals such as beginning of semester introductions that promote diversity and inclusion? 

 
At the beginning of a term, I think that emphasizing preferred names promotes inclusion. I also like to use certain icebreakers that highlight common interests and common experiences among my students. Anything that builds community, makes the classroom and school safer for all students.  

How do you hold yourself accountable when you misgender a student, or fail to address them by their preferred name?  

I do sometimes misgender a student; I think my most common mistake is using something like “ladies and gentlemen” or “sir” or “ma’am.” When I catch myself, I apologize to the student and try to do better the next time. When I take attendance, I say the student’s preferred name to myself to practice – especially early in the semester. I am working on using more gender-neutral terms when I’m talking to classes, such as “class,” “everyone,” or “